I posted this parody, referencing Don McLean’s classic song, on Facebook a few weeks ago. The tune and first line were stuck reverberating in my mind until I woke up at 2 a.m. one morning compelled to write the rest. Journalism, like science and stand-up comedy, involves healthy skepticism and the rigorous questioning of authority. Let’s pray we get back on track soon and embrace comedy and freedom of thought as healing forces in the universe.
Oh, bye bye media pangolin pie
Followed the news pawns to Wuhan but the wet market turned dry
And orthodox reporters spread such venomous lies
Singing, “This will be the way that journalism died
This will be the way that it died.”
Viral lockdowns made us shiver
With every groupthink falsehood they delivered
Governors sentenced the sick to nursing homes
Mandated that our loved ones die alone
I can’t remember how much I cried
When faceless censors shoved all dissent aside
Bureaucrats all masked up and safe inside
The way that journalism died
Who provided funding for gain of function?
Batshit crazy research a lethal conjunction
While politicians line their pockets with cash
Middle class was forced to hoard their stash
Overlords take marching cues from Marx
Dogmatic zealots plotting in the dark
Rally addicts sleeping in the park
The way that journalism died
For years we’ve been on our own
Lady Liberty cowered before the media throne
But that’s not how it used to be?
The jesters always sing for the king and queen
Tailored wardrobe obscures everything obscene
Their voices trained to seduce you and me
In our schools the children screamed
Loved ones cried, cancel culture schemed
But all the investigations turned out token
Like fake newscasts they were broken
The turning point is here to stay
Let truth, justice and the American way
Echo from coast to coast this Memorial Day
To honor all who serve the cause of freedom
Bye bye media pangolin pie
Followed the news pawns to Wuhan but the wet market turned dry
And orthodox reporters spread such venomous lies
Singing, “This will be the way that journalism died
This will be the way that it died.”
